No, “that dirty little word”
As I recall, “No” is one of the recommended directives given to children. “No, Billy, don’t touch that!” “No, Billy, hold Mommy’s hand.” Progressives may think “no” to be too stiffling to Billy’s natural self expression. The undeniable truth is that “no” has much larger implications. It gives Billy the wisdom to know things that are safe and behaviors that work in the world and ultimately as he learns to set limits with others, to engage in meaningful connection with God and man.
In adulthood, being able to say “no” and to receive “no” from others is critical to our very connectedness to those around us. I once heard a man say it took him till the age of 40 to tell his mother, “no”. In his relationship he lacked the understanding where he left off and where his mother began. I dare say, it affected his sense of closeness with his mother making simple decisions difficult.
In a world so infused with “tolerance” and political correctness, “no” has become that dirty little word. When things are uncomfortable for us or violate our beliefs, a good hearty “no” opens up our lives for others to “get us” in a way not achieved by going with the flow. If the cry of every human heart is to be known and understood, then the journey involves the ability to say “no” and hear it from those we love and trust.
What keeps you from voicing your “no”? How much is it costing you? Do you take it personally when someone sets this same limit with you? Answers to these guestions touch at the very core of us. In a society where pretty much anything goes, we are on more medications than ever for excessive anxiety and depression. We self-medicate with alcohol and other indulgences to avoid the hard things in our lives. It may be some of this could be avoided by a willingness to say “no”.
Simply, that little word “no” could be the key to unlocking further understanding and knowledge both for ourselves and those we love.
Denise Broadwater, LPC
