The Poverty of Plenty
A concept was recently given to me that in America we suffer from the poverty of plenty. This, of course, on the surface is a contradiction. Poverty implies that we are in great need and is often associated with the basics essential to life: food, clothing, shelter. In most every case in America, those things are available to those who find themselves suffering from the basics. I would submit that as Americans who have the basic needs covered and often live in homes that anywhere else in the world would be considered affluent, yet we still remain impoverished in our spirits. The money pit we crawl into everyday forces us to work for things nearly unattainable. After all, society dictates we need to drive the right car, live in the right location, and be well traveled if we are to have others believe we are blessed, successful, and worthy of friends.
The jobless market has been a wake up call to all of us to get back to what matters. People have had to return to the dinner table instead of eating out every night at a local eatery or pull out the board games instead of hitting the theatre with the lastest release. It has forced us into looking for conversations with friends, walks in the park under the cover of a full moon, and along the way to experience a full belly laugh over something unexpected, or maybe even to cry without reserve or shame over life transitions. Having to do without can be the catalyst to actual freedom from the things that bring us stress.
When I did agency work, I lacked time and discipline to set salon appointments ahead so I found salons that were open to walk ins. One afternoon, I was met by the most interesting hairdresser. She was from Ghana with a beautiful accent and kind face. We experienced the most immediate connection. She had a simplicity to her and and openness that was refreshing to me. You see, she had known want all too well. She worked many hours because her children were in college and she was a single mother. She could have been bitter looking for entitlements to get her out of her need to work so hard, yet she was nothing of the sort. She seemed thankful for her job and used her station in the salon as a place to impact lives, much like I do in my counseling office. She spoke of Africa and the intense poverty and the lack of medical care. She longed to return to spread the gospel and bring true peace to hearts who hurt there. She felt Americans had so much and appreciated it so little. She was truly content and grateful and I had not encountered that much in my life. It took me back a bit and made me look at my own attitudes and motives.
I sit each week with those who long to have someone who understands who they are and more importantly, someone they can trust enough to be themselves. I frequently ask, “Who do you have in your life who is safe and loves you unconditionally?” “Are you striving for things that in themselves are not bad, but lack meaning and purpose?” You see in all of our plenty, if we don’t have someone who sees us for who we are and accepts us in that place, we remain in poverty.
